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Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Thoughts

Duffy showing off his blue eye!!
Duffy and I had our 5th class last night and it went well although all the dogs seemed distracted and Duffy wasn't as focused as he has been--maybe it's the phase of the moon? Anyway, the instructor gave us extra things to do because Duffy is so smart--thank goodness one of us is!! Hahahahaha!! So while everyone practised a stay and front, she had us try it with me turning my back to Duffy and saying 'Front'. At first he didn't want to break that stay but with me waggling a treat behind my back he did come and I enticed him around to the front.  We will keep working on that. Next week is the last class, the 'exam' and graduation. We will get timed for the exercises, get points for how many sits, for instance, that we can do in 30 seconds, and there will be other fun suprises, apparently. Most other dogs and owners are doing okay: the golden lab puppy was with the wife last night and it's clear she does a lot more work with the dog than her husband does; the younger girl and her rescue brindle colored Boxer-German shepherd mix from Saskatchewan are doing really well with her dog a lot more focused and learning the commands well; the mini dachshund learns what he wants and if he wants to; the Bouvier is a big wooly mammoth puppy and isn't learning too much and I think the owners are not too happy; the little black curly haired dog of some type doesn't come to every class, and consequently they are behind; and the older man and his brindle colored mixed boxer, maybe shepherd, and who knows what else are learning nothing! The instructor worked with them quite a lot last night but later, the owner was back to his usual ways of trying to control his dog.  The dog is on the aggressive side and very dominating, the other dogs don't like her very much, and the owner should have just gone down to the casino and spent his $149 there for all the good the class is doing for either of them. Oh well!! His money!!


I think there must be some sort of cosmic upset going on right now, like sunspots or something, as things seem to be so out of whack.  I am very upset and depressed about the truck and the other driver being a liar.  And I'm afraid that he's going to get away with it. It was recommended to me by an aquaintance that I should get a lawyer and maybe I should. If there's a possibility of criminal charges against my husband, that would be advisable and apparently there's a 2 year  period in which a person can press charges. I just can't believe that a person would deliberately lie, when he went through that red light and caused an accident.  Some example he's setting for his granddaughter.  Soon it will be a month since the accident and we don't appear to be any closer to some resolution.

I've noticed that I am entering another phase in the grieving process--I'm a lot more emotional now than I was earlier in the year.  I think this is compounded by the fact that Mother's birthday is next week and then Christmas is coming up quickly. I always did special things for Mother's birthday, and not just in that last years while she was in the EG and of course my mother made Christmas through all the years of my youth and beyond.  Without her here, it will be so much harder to make an effort.  My dad was never a part of holidays very much--he was always having an attack of neurosis when it was Mother's birthday and was usually a real jerk and the same thing would happen at Christmas. So it was Mother and I. I guess the first year without someone is the hardest.

If we are in a cosmic disruption, I sure hope it passes by quickly!! If I have offended people or not done as I should, I apologize and I will try to do better. If others are going through difficult times too, I wish them well and send good thoughts. And I will think positive thoughts for myself too!!

6 comments:

J. said...

Thinking of you...((HUGS)). I know this month and Christmas is going to be a tough one for you. Just know that everyone around you is here if you need some support.

And I hope the accident stuff gets resolved satisfactorily. I know it looks bleak now, but maybe with some prayers and the right people involved, it'll all be okay.

Dianne SS said...

Thank you Jacqueline--I really appreciate your caring. ♥

I sure do hope the accident can be resolved and for the honest side. I did talk to the lawyer Gloria recommended, but he said there wasn't anything a lawyer could do at this point and he advised letting the insurance companies work it out. Yeah, well...!!

Squishy said...

All this will pass. The holidays will certainly be hard without your mother and especially because it's the first year. Grief has so many levels and my experience with it is it doesn't go in a line. You might think you're over something and past that and there it is again. It sucks about the accident. Nothing fun about that and not even having a lawyer support you. I agree with him though, to let the insurance companies work it out. Let it go, if you can. It's taking away precious energy from you.
Funny on the owner who should have gone to the casinos. He probably doesn't need a dog either! Good luck with your graduation. I'm sure Duffy will do great.

Squishy said...

P.S. I love the new photo at the top of your blog. The last one always bothered me because you covered your face with your type.

Dianne SS said...

No, that owner should never have got a dog and especially not that one!

The best pictures are the ones where my face is covered or I'm at a distance!! LOL!!!

As for the accident, I abhor injustice and dishonesty and that's what bothers me the most. Whose insurance fixes whose vehicle is not that important--I'd get the truck fixed right now if I didn't have to wait for the insurance companies to decide whose at fault first. But you're right Diana, this has been taking energy from me. But I actually feel less angry this week, so maybe I'm letting go. I have also found out some intersting things about the other driver (it helps when you have a friend who grew up in that town!!) and he's not a very nice man and did not behave very professionally as a teacher and a vice-principal. So I am not so surprised that he has behaved the way he has.

Grief is an on-going, ever changing entity.

Squishy said...

Don't cover your face!!! You don't need to ~ EVER!!
This man has his journey and you guys have some part in it now. It will be good in the end. There will be a reason. Please take care and I'm glad you are less angry than last week. Good will come out of it.